Bruno's Christmas On The Mall

Bruno's Christmas On The Mall
by John Forster & Tom Chapin
© 1994 Limousine Music Co. & The Last Music Co. (ASCAP)

Every Christmas Grandma Hall
Takes us Christmas shopping.
Down to Macy’s on the Mall
Where the joint is hopping.
Once through the revolving door…
Twice through the revolving door…
Thrice through the rev--
Grandma: Come along children!

Come along. Come along.
It’s Christmas on the mall.
With Bruno, Shirley, Sue and Mike
And Spike and Grandma Hall.
Little Spike has brought along a list
As long as he is tall,
Spike: Let’s go see Santa.
Come along, it’s Christmas on the mall.

Off we raced and joined the hysteria.
Grandma Hall could not have been cheeria,
Bought us luncheon at the Buffeteria,
Shakes and franks and fries.
Spike: Come on… Santa!
Then we got on line to see Santa Claus.
Waited, waited, waited for Santa Claus.
Spike got 15 seconds with Santa Claus,
Ho ho ho. Time flies.
Grandma said, “I’ve got to buy a tie for Uncle Lee.
We’ll meet back here in Camping Gear
At quarter after three.”
Bruno said, “We’ll be here.”
And we watched her disappear.
Bruno: Where to, gang?
Kids: To Toys. To Toys! To Toys! To Toys! To Toys!
Up the escalator we’re thundering.
Down the escalator we’re thundering.
Up the escalator we’re thundering on our way to toys.
Come along (to toys!). Come along (to toys!).
It’s Christmas on the mall.
Kids: To dolls. Mitts. Games.
Bruno: And kits.
And stuff for girls and boys.
Kids: And even though you know
That you could never have it all,
Bruno: It’s fun to dream so come along,
It’s Christmas on the mall.

At 3:15 we headed back but Grandma Hall was late.
So we found a tent with sleeping bags
And crept inside to wait.
Unknown to us, as time went by -- 3:30, 4, 4:10 --
Our Grandma had forgotten us,
And gone home on the crosstown bus.
Kids: She does that now and then.
And meanwhile, in our teepee we all fell fast asleep.

Kids: Hey, Bruno, wake up.
We fell asleep. It’s really late!
Bruno: Oh, no!
Through the flap we softly stepped
On new-fallen plastic snow.
Kids: It’s so quiet.
Bruno: It’s empty.
Kids: I bet it’s closed for the day.
We’re locked in. What’ll we do?
Bruno: I know! We’ll play!
Come along. Come along.
It’s Christmas on the mall.
Kid: We’re gonna get in trouble.
Bruno: No! We’re gonna have a ball.
Shirley, Spikey, don’t ya get it?
We can have it all! It’s Magic Time!
Come along, it’s Christmas on the mall.

Up in Music, played all the cool guitars.
Down in Deli ate all the chocolate bars.
Raced from aisle to aisle in the pedal cars,
Bikes and scooters...
And up in Pets we checked the aquarium,
Then hooked up a home planetarium,
Thundered through the Lady’s Underwearium
Toward Computerland.
Shirley found the switch and turned on sixty-four TV’s.
Sixty-one Fred Flintstones and three NYPD’s.
Then Bruno on a forklift truck
Came roaring through the door.
Bruno: Who wants a ride?
Kids: I do.
Bruno: Come on!
We tore off through the store.
Through Antiques, through Shoes and Sneaks
Our reckless ride extended.
And there in Small Appliances
Is where the party ended.
Guard: Hey, you kids. What are you doing?
Kids: Nothing.
Guard: Lower the forklift.
Someone’s looking for you.
We went downstairs and there was Grandma
So relieved and glad.
Grandma: Are you alright?
Bruno: Sure.
Kid: We’re okay.
Grandma: The fright you must have had.
Kid: See I told you she’d get here.
Spike: Can we do this every year?
Grandma: Come along.
Kids: Please!
Grandma: We’ll see.
Kids: Aww.
It’s Christmas on the Mall.
It didn’t last, it went too fast
But oh, we had a ball.
Every kid deserves a night when they can have it all.
A rowdy night of toys and song,
With no adults to say it’s wrong,
A night like this one, come along, come along.
Come along… It’s Christmas on the Mall.

This song appears on Tom Chapin's Zag Zig CD.

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